m@d_r@ving$

hmmm..

2009-10-23T17:24:00.001+08:00

i forgot i had this here.
=D

don't mess with the father.

2009-08-10T11:08:00.001+08:00

When the good Lord was creating Fathers, he started with a tall frame.
A female angel nearby said, "What kind of a Father is that? If you're going to make children so close to the ground, why have you put the Father up so high? He won't be able to shoot marbles without kneeling, tuck a child in bed without bending, or even kiss a child without stooping"

God smiled and said, "Yes, but if I make him child size, who would children have to look up to?"

And when God made a Father's hands, they were large.
The angel shook her head and said, "Large hands can't manage diaper pins, small buttons, rubber bands on pony tails, or even remove splinters caused from baseball bats."

Again God smiled and said, "I know, but they're large enough to hold everything a small boy empties from his pockets, yet small enough to cup a child's face in them."

Then God molded long slim legs and broad shoulders, "Do you realize you just made a Father without a lap?" The angel chuckled.

God said, "A Mother needs a lap. A Father needs strong shoulders to pull a sled, to balance a boy on a bicycle, or to hold a sleepy head on the way home from the circus."

When God was in the middle of creating the biggest feet any one had ever seen, the angel could not contain herself any longer.

"That's not fair. Do you honestly think those feet are going to get out of bed early in the morning when the baby cries, or walk through a birthday party without crushing one or two of the guests?"

God again smiled and said, "They will work. You will see. They will support a small child who wants to ride to Branbury Cross or scare mice away from a summer cabin, or display shoes that will be a challenge to fill."

God worked throughout the night, giving the Father few words, but a firm authoritative voice; eyes that see everything, but remain calm and tolerant.

Finally, almost as an after thought, He added tears. Then he turned to the angel and said, "Now are you satisfied he can love as much as a Mother can?"
The angel said nothing more.

Diwali... the modern explanation...

2009-07-30T03:16:00.002+08:00

Got this joke a few weeks ago.. good stuff..

A young second generation Indian in the US was asked by his mother to explain the significance of 'Diwali' to his younger brother, this is how he went about it...

'So, like this dude had, like, a big cool kingdom and people liked him. But, like, his step-mom, or something, was kinda a bitch, and she forced her husband to, like, send this cool-dude, he was Ram, to some national forest or something... Since he was going, for like, something like more than 10 years or so.. he decided to get his chick(Sita) and his bro(Laxman) along... you know...so that they could all chill out together.

But Dude, the forest was reeeeal scary shit... really man...they had monkeys and devils and shit like that. But this dude, Ram, kicked with darts and bows and arrows... so it was fine. But then some bad gangsta boys, some jerk called Ravan, picks up his babe (Sita) and lures her a way to his hood. And boy, was our man, and also his bro, Laxman, pissed..... all the gods were with him... So anyways, you don't mess with gods. So, Ram, and his bro get an army of monkeys.Dude, don't ask me how they trained the damn monkeys... just go along with me, ok...so it was like..., Ram, Lax and their monkeys whip this gangsta's ass in his own hood.

Anyways, by this time, their time's up in the forest..and anyways...it gets kinda boring,you know... no TV or malls or shit like that. So,they decided to hitch a ride back home...and when the people realize that our dude, his bro and the wife are back home... they thought, well, you know, at least they deserve something nice... and they didn't have any bars or clubs in those days... so they couldn't take them out for a drink, so they, like, decided to smoke and shit...and since they also had some lamps, they lit the lamps also... so it was pretty coooooooooool thing...you know with all those fireworks n stuff...

Really, they even had some local band play along with the fireworks... and you know what, dude, that was the very first, no kidding.., that was the very first music-synchronized fireworks... you know, like the 4th of July stuff, but just, more cooler and stuff, you know. And, so dude, that was how, like, this festival started.'

And the Mother fainted.

And Vickna collapsed on the floor laughing!!!

THE MAN CODE! REMEMBER IT!

2009-07-21T22:13:00.000+08:00

Courtesy of SeductionLabs.

1. Thou shall not rent the movie Chocolate.

2. If you’ve known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever! Unless you actually marry her.

3. When questioned by a buddy’s wife, girlfriend, mother, father, priest, shrink, dentist, accountant, or dog walker, you need not and should not provide any useful information as to his whereabouts. You are even permitted to deny his very existence.

4. Unless he murdered someone in your immediate family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 24 hours.

5. You may exaggerate any anecdote told in a bar by 50% without recrimination; beyond that, anyone within earshot is allowed to yell out “BULLSHIT!” (Exception: When trying to pick up a girl, the allowable exaggeration is 400%)

6. Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.

7. The minimum amount of time you have to wait for another guy is 5 minutes. The maximum is 6 minutes. For a girl, you are required to wait 10 minutes for every point of hotness she scores on the classic 1-10 babe scale.

8. Complaining about the brand of free beverages in a buddy’s refrigerator is forbidden. But you may gripe if the temperature is unsuitable.

9. A friend must be permitted to borrow anything you own – grill, car, firstborn child – within 12 hr notice. Women or anything considered “lucky” are not applicable in this case.

10. Agreeing to distract the skanky friend of a hot babe that your buddy is trying to hook up with is your legal duty. Should you get carried away with your good deed and end up having sex with the beast, your pal is forbidden to ever speak of it.

11. On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

12. Before dating a buddy’s ex you are required to ask his permission and he in return is required to grant it. He is however allowed to say, “man, you’re gonna love the way she licks your balls”.

13. Women who claim they “love to watch sports” must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to pick a Buffalo wing clean.

14. If a man’s zipper is down, that’s his problem – You didn’t see nothin’.

15. No man is ever required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering a best friend’s birthday is strictly optional, and slightly gay.

16. You must offer heartfelt condolences over the death of a girlfriend’s cat, even if it was you who secretly set it on fire, and threw it into a ceiling fan.

17. While your girlfriend must bond with your buddy’s girlfriends within 30 minutes of meeting them, you are not required to make nice with her gal pal’s boyfriends – Low level sports bonding is all the law requires.

18. Unless you have a lucrative endorsement contract, never appear in public wearing more than one Nike swoosh.

19. When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may always ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who is playing.

20. When your girlfriend/wife expresses a desire to fix her ugly, whiny friend up with your pal, you must grant permission, but only if you have ample time to warn your friend to prepare his excuse about joining the priesthood.

21. Only in a situation of mortal danger or ass peril are you permitted to kick another member of the male species in the testicles.

22. Unless you’re in prison, never fight naked.

23. If your buddy is outnumbered outmanned, or too drunk to defend himself, you must jump into the fight. Exception: If within the past 24 hours his actions have caused you to think “What this guy needs is a good ass whuppin’, then you may sit back and enjoy.

24. A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.

25. When picking players for sports teams it is permissible to skip over your buddy in favour of better athletes – as long as you don’t let him be the last sorry son of a bitch standing on the sideline.

26. If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you better be referring to his beer.

27. Never join your girlfriend/wife in ragging on a buddy of yours, unless she is withholding sex, pending your response.

28. Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while weight lifting:
“Yeah, baby, push it!”
“C’mon, give me one more! Harder!”
“Another set and we can hit the showers”
“Nice ass, are you a Sagittarius?”

29. Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both. That’s just mean.

30. Never talk to another man in the bathroom unless you’re on equal footing: either both urinating or both waiting in line. In all other situations, a nod will do just fine.

31. Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her.

32. You can not rat out a friend who show’s up to work or class with a massive hangover, however you may: hide the aspirin, smear his chair with limburger cheese, turn the brightness on his computer way up so he thinks its broken, or have him paged every seven minutes.

33. If your buddy is trying to hook up with a girl, you may sabotage him only in a manner that gives you no chances of getting any either.

34. Before allowing a drunken friend to cheat on his girl, you must attempt one intervention. If he can get up on his feet, look you in the eye, and deliver a “Fuck off!” then you are absolved from all responsibility. Later on it is ok that you have no idea what his girlfriend is talking about.

35. The morning after you and a babe, who was formerly “just a friend”, go at it, the fact that you’re feeling weird and guilty is no reason not to jump on her again before there is a discussion about what a big mistake it was.

36. When using a urinal in a public restroom, a buffer zone of at least one urinal will exist at all times. If the only empty urinal is directly next to an occupied on, then you are still required to wait.

37. When coming to a room which you know is occupied by your friend and possibly another girl, you must knock and wait for an adequate response. If no response occurs, and the door is locked, a 10 minute period is required before knocking again.

38. If you accidentally touch or brush against any part of another man below the waist, it is an understood accident, and NO apologies or any reference to the occurrence is necessary.

39. Any dispute lasting any longer than 3 minutes must be settled by rock, paper, scissors. There is no argument too important for this determining method.

40. Only acceptable time when a man is allowed to cry:
When a heroic dog dies to save his master.
After being struck in the testicles with anything moving faster than 7 mph.
When your date is using her teeth.
The day Anna Kornikova chooses a husband.

41. If a hot girl shall happen to pass by while you are in an arms reach of your buddy, you must, tap him on the shoulder to make him aware of the babe.

42. A man’s shoes may not intentionally match any other article of clothing on his body.

43. No man shall ever allow anyone to speak ill of The Simpsons or any Rocky movie. (Exception: Rocky V)

44. Any object thrown with reasonable speed and accuracy, MUST be caught.

45. No man shall ever keep track of, or count, the amount of beers he has drunk in a night.

46. It is permissible to consume a fruity chick drink only when you’re sunning on a tropical beach, and it’s delivered by a topless supermodel, and it’s free.

47. Under no circumstances may two non-related men share a bed or anything which could be perceived as a mattress.

48. If you jiggle more than twice, you’re playing with it.

49. A man shall never help another man apply sun tan oil.

50. It is the God given duty of every man to assist any other man that may be in need of assistance in obtaining a threesome with two girls.

why planning is so important.

2009-07-16T19:31:00.003+08:00

if i'd planned it, at least i'd remember the words that i used...
if i'd planned it, the words might have come out smoother, rather than tumbling out...
if i'd planned it, we would have been having a nice romantic dinner - no lar, too cliche..
we would have been at Kings Park - no lar, too blardy cold!!

anyway, as it were, anu was bugging me out about the price of jewelery and the fact that most of the stores were on sale.

she kept going on and on abt it.
then down on one knee i went as she sat on the sofa at the boys place.
"I want to ask you a question, a question that's been asked so many times before, i think the best way to do this is the simplest. Will you marry me?"

as i said, i can't remember the exact words and neither can she. the above is paraphrased as best as possible.

She : YES!

and as all wise men say, the rest is history.

so on the 27th day of the 6th month of the year 2009.....

ANOTHER ONE BIT THE DUST!!

random broadband speed test...

2009-06-01T03:58:00.002+08:00

from my office physically sitting in cyberjaya
using speedtest.net
*when i'm using proxy, i let the site determine nearest test server.

using cyberjaya proxy to kl test server:
download : 8.92Mbps
upload : 2.22Mbps
latency : 3ms

using penang proxy to kl test server:
29.25
18.85
24

using penang proxy to penang test server:
22.11
17.50
14

using americas proxy to americas test server:
2.17
2.06
238

now unfortunately, i'm a good employee and do not p2p or download porn in my office...
BUT AT ALMOST 30MB A SECOND I'M FREAKING TEMPTED LA!!!!

could be worse..

2009-05-19T17:46:00.005+08:00

olle world!
shattap abt how often i post or don't k.. life is such.
this came in the mail today and i thought i'd share..
she sounds like such a nice, lovely girl... but alas i'm already taken...


Hi, gentleman!

Love is like a butterfly, the more you chase it, the more it will elude you.
But if you turn your attention towards other things it will come and
softly sit on your shoulder.
******http://all-hot-love.com/33289****** (removed the 
hyperlink - oh and pls don't go there la.. probably some
spam site THINK SECURITY PPL)
I am a very happy positive person that likes to enjoy life to the max. I am
loving, fun, down to earth. I love to play sports. :) I am looking for some
one that has all most the same qualities that I have.
I want to find a kind, sincere, romantic man for long-term relationships,
to find somebody to make happy and to take care of.

Yourth faithfully
Nata

W1MAX random speed test

2009-04-01T10:34:00.003+08:00

i loved the blisteringly fast speeds!
it makes me want to take the streamyx pale blue router and stick it up their tech support reps backside.

Alas, as can be seen from the below random test results, consistency is another thing.
i even had skype drop out a few times due to the instability of the connection.
so W1MAX, good try, but not good enough...

10:16 AM 3/27/2009
download : 1.29Mbps
upload : 0.36Mbps
latency : 57ms

1:29 PM 3/27/2009
0.95
0.21
61

5:56 PM 3/27/2009
1.23
0.19
62

9:33 PM 3/27/2009
0.99
0.01
59

11:08 PM 3/27/2009
0.56
taking too long
84

9:24 AM 3/28/2009
1.20
0.27
82

9:45 PM 3/28/2009
0.96
taking too long
83

1:41 AM 4/1/2009
0.74
0.04
112

10:31 AM 4/1/2009
1.22
0.29
76

Sample streamyx jump off my neighbors connection (wireless)
10:32 AM 4/1/2009
1.28
0.42
30

a bitch post!!!

2009-03-25T10:37:00.001+08:00

now, where would you THINK i'd rather be?
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK

god's on fb...

2009-03-08T08:09:00.002+08:00

got this sometime back from jam!
good stuff!

WHAT a duck?

2009-03-03T10:29:00.003+08:00

THIS IS TOO FUCKING GOOD TO NOT BLOG LA!!!!!
pinched from here.

An ode to duck fucking to the tune of the popular children's song, "Row, Row, Row Your Boat"

Fuck, fuck, fuck a duck.
Screw a kangaroo.
69 a porcupine.
Orgy at the zoo.

Fuck, fuck, fuck a duck.
Screw a kangaroo.
Finger an orangutang.
Orgy at the zoo.

Fuck, fuck, fuck a duck.
Screw a kangaroo.
Eat a grape, rape an ape.
Orgy at the zoo.

Fuck, fuck, fuck a duck.
Screw a kangaroo.
Masturbate with a snake
Sunning at the zoo.

Fuck, fuck, fuck a duck
Gently in the ass
Roll around on the ground
Until you cum at last!

auto-piloting my way home...

2009-02-23T20:12:00.005+08:00

having a good auto-pilot is important.
it allows u to make the time pass quicker.

but after the graveyard shift, when auto-pilot takes you into the motorbike lane while you're in the cage, it's so fucking embarrassing!!
thank my lucky stars i managed to swerve out in time...

and because i'm on 4 wheels, this is what i have to go through again...
notice how it's not even bright yet!?

Obama as a symbol of globalization By Nury Vittachi

2009-01-29T16:36:00.001+08:00

Got this from here.

ABSO-FREAKING_HILARIOUS!!!!

*

Security guards at the airport just made me take off my belt. Huh? How could my belt be a threat? Did I really look like I could subdue 300 people on a jumbo jet using only a 30-inch strap designed to stop my trousers falling down?Belt

Instead of being irritated, I decided to interpret this as a compliment, which made me feel much better. (Yes, men are sad creatures.)

*

It's been an odd week. I had lunch the other day in a restaurant that had previously always banned me. My earlier crime? Refusing to wear a tie. I've disliked ties ever since someone told me ties were a type of noose: same knot, same level of tension, same ability to kill. (Why are ties not banned on aircraft?)
*
The opening up of fancy restaurants to the tie-less is due to globalization. It is no longer possible to exclude people like me on the grounds of our not wearing Western clothes.

The world's ultimate example of globalization was surely an incident which took place a few days ago: the ascent of Barack Obama to the most powerful seat in the world.

Get this. He is a Chicago man, born in Hawaii, with an African father, an Indonesian stepfather and a mother from English-Irish stock with Native American elements. His first name is Swahili for "blessed one", his second is Arabic for "good-looking" and his third is a town in Japan. His family members speak French, Cantonese, Bahasa Indonesian and German.

His favourite possession is a BlackBerry, a Canada-assembled phone made from Chinese and Indian components. His favourite dishes are Italian (shrimp linguini) and Mexican (chilli) and the foods he misses from his childhood are bakso (Indonesian meatball soup) and rambutan (a Malaysian fruit).

He and his family dress in clothes from J Crew, a firm which buys Italian cashmere, Czech glass buttons and British wool and ships them to Asia for assembly into American clothes. His not-very-secret vice is Marlboro, a British cigarette made with American tobacco and sold in boxes bearing a Latin motto. His favourite reading matter is Harry Potter (Scottish), Spider-Man (American) and The Bible (Middle Eastern).

*

His inauguration takes the title of The World's Most Globalized Event from the death of Princess Diana, defined thus: An English princess with an Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a French tunnel in a German car with a Dutch engine driven by a Belgian drunk on Scottish whisky. She was followed by Italian Paparazzi on Japanese motorcycles and was treated by an American doctor using Brazilian medicines.

*

In the meantime, you may be reading this syndicated article in a newspaper: a British publishing format using German movable type printed on paper, a Chinese invention. Or you may be reading this on a computer, a machine designed in the west and assembled in the east, using Taiwanese chips, Korean monitors and Chinese casings, assembled by Bangladeshi and Sri Lankan workers in Singaporean plants, and transported to you on ships manned by Filipino and Indian sailors, hijacked en route by Somali pirates and rescued by US gunships.

The miracle of globalization means this column will be read by people from the Caribbean to Colombo to China. Even though it is written by a man in an airport whose trousers just fell down.

a waste of 1 hour 28 minutes...

2009-01-26T13:59:00.004+08:00

DISASTER MOVIE (2008).
there are only 3, yes THREE good things about that movie.
1) Vanessa Minnillo
2) Kim Kardashian
3) Carmen Electra

i actually could feel my brain cells dying after the first 3 minutes, but.. no la.. i have no excuses for watching the whole thing...
except the 3 as above... and even then, i still think it was an absolute waste of my time.

i am so very disappointed in myself.
oh and to borrow the wise words of the Enchanted Princess, watch this movie only if you have "Drugs. Lots and lots snd lots of mind-altering, enchanting, DRUGS!"

Room for 2 by Saer Ze

2008-12-29T01:58:00.001+08:00

i watched this video a long time ago, but only just revisited it..
me like.
me like very much.

i'm easy...

2008-10-29T17:04:00.004+08:00

was on facebook..
i announced that it was my 'friday' on wednesday morning..
kavilan msged me saying he wished it was his friday too, cos he was looking forward to having a few beers with the boys...

walked into the kitchen and saw the bottle.
now i'm down 2 HUGE ass mugs of whiskey coke..
and i'm slightly *mabuk

*mabuk = drunk.

*above was spell checked and corrected.
below wasn't.
HAHHAHHA!!!

oits' relaly hard to tyow whilr im' drunlkl!

mother and daughter released...

2008-10-24T13:35:00.002+08:00

read all about it here.

Uthaya's niece, 11 others held

2008-10-24T10:02:00.001+08:00

Original article can be found here.
Andrew Ong | Oct 23, 08 6:08pm
The six-year-old niece of detained Hindraf leader P Uthayakumar was with 11 people arrested when they attempted to submit a letter at Prime Minister Department’s office in Putrajaya today.
MCPX

Vwaishhnnavi (right) is the daughter of Hindraf chairperson P Waythamoorthy who is currently in self-imposed exile in London. Her mother K Shanti was among those arrested.

Police Watch Malaysia coordinator S Jayathas, who was also held, claimed that they had been told that they were part of an illegal assembly for having gathered near the entrance of the building.

“We were trying to obtain permission from the security guards for Vwaishhnnavi to submit her letter. They said that we were from Hindraf, but we insisted that we were 'concerned Indians' who were accompanying Vwaishnnavi,” Jayathas when contacted.

They are currently at the Putrajaya district police headquarters, but police chief Abd Razak Abd Majid declined comment when contacted.

Kuala Lumpur police chief Muhammad Sabtu Osman confirmed the arrest of eight men and three women during the incident. He clarified that Vwaishhnnavi has not been arrested and is in her mother’s care.

He also said the 11 are being investigated under the Societies Act. (The Home Ministry had imposed a ban on Hindraf on Oct 15, declaring it an illegal grouping.)

Waythamoorthy furious

Contacted on her handphone while waiting for police to record her statement, Shanti said the group had attempted to submit a handwritten letter calling on Prime Minister Abdullah Ahmad Badawi to release all those detained under the Internal Security Act (ISA) .

“The appeal letter (in Vwaishhnnavi’s handwriting) asked the prime minister to release her uncle, (and other Hindraf leaders as well as) RPK (blogger Raja Petra Kamaruddin), among other ISA detainees,” said Shanti.

“She said that Deepavali would not mean anything to her and all Malaysians, if they are not released.”

Shanti said the letter also included an invitation for Abdullah to attend the family’s ‘open house’ in conjunction with Deepavali.

“(Vwaishhnnavi) wrote that she would be waiting with flowers and cakes,” she added.

Contacted in London by phone, Waythamoorthy expressed outrage that his daughter, wife and supporters had been picked up by police.

“It’s ridiculous to arrest [sic] a child who has come to deliver a Deepavali card and a letter to the PM asking him to release all ISA detainees,” said an obviously incensed Waythamoorthy.

“This only shows that the PM is not telling the truth when he said he is a PM for everyone. He is not!”

On Dec 13 last year, five Hindraf leaders - Uthayakumar, M Manoharan, R Kenghadharan, V Ganabatirau and T Vasantha Kumar - were slapped with a two-year detention order under the ISA. They are being held at the Kamunting detention camp in Perak.

Taken to court tomorrow

Meanwhile, about a small crowd of about 30 people had gathered outside the Putrajaya police headquarters from 7pm to find out the latest on the plight of those detained.

As of 11pm, all 11 and Vwaishhnnavi were still being held at the Putrajaya police station.

The mother and daughter were finally released later in the night but they refused to leave the station in solidarity with the rest.

It is also learnt that the remaining 10 would be taken to the Kajang court in the morning for remand order.

Giving Up Isn't An Option - An Email from Katrina Jorene

2008-10-22T19:40:00.002+08:00

Dear Friends & Family,

What may be the last leg of this long journey starts next week: mom's appeal at the High Court resumes (starts?) on the 28th of Oct. The appeal will be heard until the 30th of Oct, followed by the next hearing dates from the 24th - 28th November '08. The judge has expressed that he'd like to give judgment by the end of 2008.

[The first round of the Appeal will be heard at 9am, October 28 – 30 in Criminal Court 2 of the High Court Level 5, Room 2.]

13 years is a really long time, but the fight for what's right & just is a tireless process. You stop, they win. We've had enough time to catch a breath, so now it's back to the good fight. I'm writing to you today because you've been wonderful, and supportive, and now, more than ever, your support is needed.

I know that as this has gone on for more than a decade, many of us have moved on to different things (understandably!), but for those who still keep mom and the rest of us in your thoughts and prayers, I can't sufficiently express how thankful we are. For those who have forgotten, or who are simply exhausted by this insane process, I'm asking you now to remember & to re.energize your spirits.

Quite simply put, we're not going to win this alone. We need you. All of you.

So, what can you do:

1. Show up in court:
- A packed court room is so.incredibly.important. The judge, who at times appears to enjoy being a real ...well, arse, up there in his judge.seat, gets his act together when there's a strong presence of supporters. The show of support & solidarity is also important for the cause, for the people we're fighting for, and for mom.

2. Write about it:
- We cannot rely on the mass media in Malaysia to carry this story as they are much too controlled by the authorities. If they do cover the trial, it's usually buried at the back...near the obituaries (I wish i was kidding!).

As such, please:

Blog
Email your friends
Write letters asking for support
Write letters to the authorities
Write to newspapers ; hey, they may stick your letter at the back, but at least its there!

3. Tell your friends / family / community:

- We need you to talk about the trial, but we also need you to talk about what the trial stands for. 13 years down the line, there has just been a further erosion of the rights of migrants and refugees in Malaysia. Silence from our part simply supports this denial of basic rights. Let us not be bystanders.

4. Pray:
- Storm heaven with prayers. We should never underestimate the power of prayer.

5. Do what your conscience asks you to.
- Just that.

I know my list is long and my requests plenty. Ultimately though, please do what you can in your own capacity. We can never be too far away to fight for what is right. We should never be too busy to ignore what's important.

From the bottom of my soul, I thank you.

I'd just really like my mother *back* by year end. There's lots more work to be done.

Peace.Prayers.Possibilities.

katrina/jorene/kat/treena

"The man who defends his friends in never overwhelmed by the storms of life;
he is strong enough to come through difficulties and to carry on"
- The Manual of The Warrior of Light

www.tenaganita.net
http://campaigns.ahrchk.net/irenefernandez/mainfile.php/events/31/

The Trial of Irene Fernandez

2008-10-22T20:23:00.002+08:00

This article can be found here. It was originally posted on 2004-01-09

ABOUT THE TRIAL OF IRENE FERNANDEZ, DIRECTOR OF TENAGANITA, MALAYSIA

14 October 2003

DAY FOR JUDGEMENT BROUGHT FORWARD

The day for the Judgement on the trial of Irene Fernandez, the longest running trial in the Malaysian legal history was abruptly brought forward to 14th October 2003.

When the defence wound up its case in March this year, the Magistrate asked the prosecution and defence counsels to make written submissions and set March 17, 2004, as the day when the verdict would be delivered.

However, on Friday, 10th October 2003, the defence lawyers were informed that judgement would be delivered on Tuesday 14th October 2003 and asked that the written submission be handed in by Saturday, 11th Oct 2003.

The sudden change of date has placed Irene and Tenaganita is a difficult situation; The leading counsel for Irene is abroad on a fact finding mission and her other lawyer is engaged in another matter in the high court. Therefore it has not been possible for the defence to make its written submission and furthermore Irene¡¦s lawyers will not be able to be present in court on 14th October when the verdict is delivered. The abrupt decision to conclude the trial in this manner appears to constitute a miscarriage of justice.

Background

* Irene Fernandez was arrested by the police at her home on 18th March 1996. She was charged under Section 8A(1) of the Printing and Publications Act 1984 for "maliciously publishing false news" through the issue of a memorandum entitled, "Abuse, Torture and Dehumanised Treatment of Migrant Workers at the Detention Camps". The maximum penalty for this offence is imprisonment for a term not exceeding three years or a fine not exceeding RM20, 000.00 or both.

* Bail was posted at RM3000 and her passport was impounded as part of the bail condition. Each time she wants to leave the country for any reason she has to make an application to the court for the release of her passport.

* The Memorandum, "Abuse, Torture and Dehumanised Treatment of Migrant Workers at the Detention Camps" was released by Tenaganita in August 1995. The findings in the Memorandum comprises information that Tenaganita received from interviews with more than 300 ex-detainees during the course of its research on "Migration, Health and HIV/AIDS".

* The interviews with the ex-detainees showed consistent abuse, torture, denial of access to lawyers, denial of proper medical care, widespread diseases, lack of food and water and even deaths in the detention camps due to negligence on the part of the authorities. The Memorandum describes treatment of detainees in a manner which violates Article 5 of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, which prohibits torture or cruel, inhuman or degrading treatment or punishment.

The facts contained in the memorandum gave rise to expressions of concern by individuals and organisations locally and internationally. The Malaysian authorities, instead of investigating the allegations, promptly denied that anything was amiss and instituted criminal proceedings against Irene.
"On the first day of my trial, I had stated to the press that since the government had refused to conduct its own independent inquiry, this trial will then become the public inquiry I asked for. We hope that through the trial, the truth will be revealed. As far as we are concerned, we raised, in a legitimate way, with authorities, issues of public concern, e.g.:- problems faced by migrant workers, inside and outside detention centres". Irene Fernandez, June 1997

* On May 30, 1996, on the advice of her lawyers, Irene makes an application to transfer the case from Magistrate Court to High Court. One of the reasons for the application for transfer is that the case will be best adjudicated in the High Court. This is because Section 8A of the Printing and Presses and Publications Act, 1984, under which Irene is charged, seems to negate Article 10 of the Constitution, which guarantees the right to freedom of expression. And the key issue of the treatment of migrant workers at the detention centres has become a national and international concern. However, on 05 June 1996, judge Hashim Yusof, dismissed the application for transfer to High Court.

To date, the trial of Irene Fernandez is the longest running trial in the Malaysian legal history. During this period, Irene has been in the court for over 310 days of full hearing and she had made over 30 applications for the release of her passport to travel to foreign countries to represent the organisation and for medical treatment.

The trial of Irene Fernandez was postponed for about 2 years as the court would not provide a Bengali interpreter. It reconvened on 14th January 2003.

On 17th March 2003 the defence lawyers for Irene wound up the defence case. The decision by the defence to conclude its case was made after it had made several unsuccessful attempts to get women witnesses who had been detainees more than seven years earlier. On the same day the Magistrate set March 17, 2004 as the day the judgement would be given after receiving the submissions from the defence and prosecution.

However the day of judgement was suddenly brought forward to 14 October 2003.

THE TESTIMONIES

During the trial Tenaganita brought five former detainees from Bangladesh to testify on her behalf. They testified on conditions in four different detention camps, Semenyih, Kemayan, Tanah Merah and Langkap. The testimonies of the five former detainees were much more graphic and painted a picture of the conditions in the detention centres that were far worse than what was described in the Memorandum. Almost all the former detainees were in the tears describing the torture and sexual abuse that they had experienced. Although these witnesses were rigorously cross-examined by the prosecution their testimony was unshaken. On the other hand, the prosecution claimed that the police had interviewed 36 former detainees during the course of its investigations but not a single detainee was produced in court to testify on behalf of the prosecution.

Golam (former detainee)

Golam says he will never forget the repeated beatings they suffered in the camp. "The police always beat us with a police stick. They beat us on our heads, bodies and legs for no reason. Sometimes they just came and beat up everybody - it was an everyday routine. They would beat us if they found us talking, not sleeping at night or for any reason at all."

The detainees lived in constant fear, their hearts always tense. "We became unconscious after the beatings. There was no bleeding but we were in serious pain all the time. No police came to help us, but we helped each other. I never found a doctor in the camp."

Source: March 11, 2000 Malaysian 'death camps': A survivor recounts, Ajinder Kaur, Malaysiakini

Mozumder (former detainee)

Mozumder told the court that 120 Burmese inmates were forced to perform oral sex on one another.

"Police were watching how was their penis size, how they (the inmates) were performing, whether they were sucking the penis or just putting it in their mouth," he said, in reply to a question by the defence counsel.

He added that the inmates who were forced to suck the penis immediately rushed to the toilet after the act was over.

"Most of them closed their mouth with their hand and ran towards the toilet to vomit. Those who had oral sex performed on them stayed standing in the field. Their faces were pale, shamed. Most of them started crying. Some of them covered their eyes with their hand and some of them looked down to the ground," he recalled.

He testified that he could not eat his meals after witnessing the incident.

Source: Friday, May 12, 2000, Sick inmate died after being kicked by police, Ajinder Kaur, Malaysiakini

Zakir Hossain (former detainee)

"His whole body was swollen - his arms, legs, knees, face and stomach," said Zakir Hossain, 37, who was detained in Kajang's Semenyih camp for illegal immigrants six years ago.

"When I told the police, the reply was, "If the doctor comes, you can explain to him.". The policeman knew how sick he was because he had seen him. The sick inmate told police, I'm very sick, I can't move my hands and legs. Please call a doctor..."

Zakir told magistrate Juliana Mohamad that he asked the police to get a doctor about a week before the sick inmate passed away.

"He was in pain and he sometimes screamed, "My whole body is painful, please help me". He cried. I couldn't do much, but gave some consoling words that he would get well one day. I didn't think he would die because I thought the doctor would visit him," he added.

"Seven to eight days before he died, he could move his body slightly but with a lot of effort. He could eat with other's help. Someone had to carry him to the toilet," he recalled.

Zakir said that the sick inmate's condition got worse, and he was told of his death five to seven minutes after he passed away.

"He died in Block C, late in the evening. I saw his body. It was lying on the floor. His face was not covered.

Source: - June 28, 2000, Inmate died without medical help, says witness, Ajinder Kaur, Malaysiakini

TENAGANITA

Penthouse, Wisma MLS
31 Jalan Tunku Abdul Rahman
50100 Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia
Tel: 6 03 26913681 Fax: 6 03 26913681
Email: tenaganita@yahoo.co.uk

Rules of pooing at work...

2008-10-20T03:01:00.004+08:00

got this in an email and it's just too funny not to post up!

As much as we try to convince ourselves otherwise, the WORK POO is inevitable. For those who hate pooing at work, following is the Survival Guide for taking a dump at work.

CROP DUSTING -- When farting, you walk briskly around the office so the smell is not in your area and everyone else gets a whiff but doesn't know where it came from. Be careful when you do this. Do not stop until the full fart has been expelled. Walk an extra 30 feet to make sure the smell has left your pants.

FLY BY -- The act of scouting out a bathroom before pooing. Walk in and check for other pooers. If there are others in the bathroom, leave and come back again. Be careful not to become a FREQUENT FLYER. People may become suspicious if they catch you constantly going into the bathroom.

ESCAPEE -- A fart that slips out while taking a leak at the urinal or forcing a poo in a cubicle. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of embarrassment. If you release an escapee, do not acknowledge it. Pretend it did not happen.. If you are standing next to the farter in the urinal, pretend you did not hear it. No one likes an escapee. It is uncomfortable for all involved. Making a joke or laughing makes both parties feel uneasy.

JAILBREAK -- When forcing a poo, several farts slip out at a machine gun pace. This is usually a side effect of diarrhoea or a hangover. If this should happen, do not panic. Remain in the cubicle until everyone has left the bathroom to spare everyone the awkwardness of what just occurred.

COURTESY FLUSH -- The act of flushing the toilet the instant the poo hits the water. This reduces the amount of airtime the poo has to stink up the bathroom. This can help you avoid being caught doing the WALK OF SHAME.

WALK OF SHAME -- Walking from the cubicle, to the sink, to the door after you have just stunk up the bathroom. This can be a very
uncomfortable moment if someone walks in and busts you. As with farts, it is best to pretend that the smell does not exist. Can be avoided with the use of the COURTESY FLUSH.

OUT OF THE CLOSET POOER -- A colleague who poos at work and is proud of it. You will often see an Out Of The Closet Pooer enter the bathroom with a newspaper or magazine under his or her arm. Always look around the office for the Out Of The Closet Pooer before entering the bathroom.

THE POOING FRIENDS NETWORK (P.F.N) -- A group of co-workers who band together to ensure emergency pooing goes off without incident. This group can help you to monitor the whereabouts of Out Of The Closet Pooers, and identify SAFE HAVENS.

SAFE HAVENS -- A seldom-used bathroom somewhere in the building where you can least expect visitors. Try floors that are predominantly of the opposite gender . This will reduce the odds of a pooer of your gender entering the bathroom.

TURD BURGLAR -- Someone who does not realise that you are in the cubicle and tries to force the door open. This is one of the most shocking and vulnerable moments that can occur when taking a poo at work. If this occurs, remain in the cubicle until the Turd Burglar leaves. This way you will avoid all uncomfortable eye contact.

CAMO-COUGH -- A phoney cough that alerts all new entrants into the bathroom that you are in a cubicle. This can be used to cover-up a fart, a WATERMELON, or to alert potential Turd Burglars. Very effective when used in conjunction with an ASTAIRE.

ASTAIRE -- A subtle toe-tap that is used to alert potential Turd Burglars that you are occupying a cubicle. This will remove all doubt that the cubicle is occupied. If you hear an Astaire, leave the bathroom immediately so the pooer can poo in peace.

WATERMELON -- A poo that creates a loud splash when hitting the toilet water. This is also an embarrassing incident. If you feel a Watermelon coming on, create a diversion. See CAMO-COUGH.

HAVANAOMELET -- A case of diarrhoea that creates a series of loud splashes in the toilet water. Often accompanied by an Escapee. Try using a Camo-Cough with an Astaire.

UNCLE NED -- A bathroom user who seems to linger around forever.. Could spend extended lengths of time in front of the mirror or sitting on the pot. An Uncle Ned makes it difficult to relax while on the crapper, as you should always wait to poo when the bathroom is empty. This benefits you as well as the other bathroom attendees.

the way you make me feel...

2008-10-14T19:25:00.002+08:00

as i was getting ready to leave for work on sunday, it started to rain.
so i drove to work.

as i was getting ready to leave for work on monday, it started to rain.
so i drove to work.

as i was getting ready to leave for work tuesday(2 hours ago), it DID NOT START TO RAIN.
but it was threatening to.
so i put on my rain gear and RODE TO WORK!!

even though it didn't rain and i sweat my nuts off in the suit, this is how i now feel.
=D
pic courtesy of http://ihasahotdog.com/

education...

2008-10-14T02:16:00.002+08:00

taken from here...

bee en parody...

2008-10-12T22:50:00.002+08:00

watch it..
freaking hilarious la!

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=_7XCRpRwz1s

hailing a cab!

2008-10-05T22:13:00.003+08:00

to the driver of the taxi cab bearing the registration number HB 8726, a big FUCK YOU!!!
i've got your registration number and you can be fucking sure i'm lodging a report against you!!!

i had dropped off a car at the McD's near Taylors college in Subang Jaya this evening, and was supposed to be picked up.
decided to hail a cab as there were a few waiting for passengers..

open door to first cab in line and tell him where i want to go, he tells me to go to the 2nd cab.
get into 2nd cab and tell him where i want to go, he tells me to go back to first cab, says, the first cab was actually supposed to be 2nd in line and he didn't mind.
so i went back to the 1st cab in line and told him again.. he says, RM 10...
*beng number 1*
asked him what the hell he had a meter there for, and he said my destination was out of the way so he needed and extra amount.
i walked away, stopped, turned around, pulled out my mobile and snapped his cab number....
*pic to follow*

then another cab stops, and i get in, tell him where to go and he says no...
*beng number 2*
so i ask him "what the fuck are you doing driving a cab if you don't intend on driving your passengers to their destination?"
fucker has the audacity to raise his voice at me, saying he has other things to do...
gave him a "i'll kill you, rip out your eyes and pee in the empty sockets" look..
got out slammed the door and was abt to take a pic of his license plate too, but the fucker drove off too quickly...
*chicken-shit piece of dick-mold*

*point to note, the journey i needed to take was less than 7km (if i remember correctly)... from the mcd's near taylors back home to SS1 where i live.*

another cabbie pulls up, and i already have my phone in hand abt to call for a pick-up, but this guy says yeah sure get in, when i tell him my destination.
no nonsense kind of guy.
starts the meter. starts driving.
then i decide to start a conversation, not mentioning any of the previous arseholes, and this chap opens up...
speaking PERFECT english!
knowledgable!
well mannered!
HE SHOULD BE MADE A FUCKING ROLE MODEL!!!

i would have to say this ride rates up in the top 3 best cab rides i've ever taken.
KUDOS TO YOU!
AND MUCH RESPECT BROTHER!!!

to the other arseholes ruining your trade, you neglected to notice one thing about me, other than the fact i was in shorts and a faded tee.... I FUCKING TIP!!!!

the ride came up to RM7.10, but i handed him a tenner and told him to keep the change.
that is a 54% tip!!! FOR EXCELLENT SERVICE!!!!!!!
but you cunts wouldn't know anything about that now would you!

so again to all the stupid fucktards who refused to do your fucking job, the job that puts money in your pockets and food on your table, FUCK YOU!!!!

*beng - sort of like having a blood vessel explode.. or a moment of intense anger/insanity/whatchamacallit...

***m@d_r@ving$***